Can we say ‘No’ to being busy

Nowadays we are getting really busy with our tight schedules. We are having number of tasks to do and number of responsibilities in our personal, family and professional life. Sometimes we really don’t realise that how day has started and how it has ended, it just flies away with tight busy schedules. Many times we feel very guilty that we could not give time to the things, which we love to do. What is the exact fact behind being busy? Are we really asking ourselves that ‘are we really busy’?

In our regular tight scheduled day with full of tasks to do, we are used to be busy within our mind too. It has become a habit to say ourselves in our mind that I’m ‘busy’. Practicing it day by day, it becomes prestige issue. We start believing that being busy is same as being important and feeling committed in our pursuits. If we could not keep ourselves busy, we start feeling insecure. So we start ourselves pushing and over-committing. Sometimes we create a perception that people would take me for granted as a dawdler, if I would not show being busy. So it has become a prestige issue and feather in hat with a pride. But the fact is that we are impacting badly on our physical and our mental health by just saying with ourselves that ‘I am busy’.

Once we start saying ourselves that I’m busy, we miss many of our opportunities. Let’s take an example. We have listed few tasks to be done, when we have free time.  In any of our average day, sometimes we may have a free time of an hour or two at our work-place or even at home. We spend that time with something which is not important for us or time just get passes away un-consciously. We do not recall those listed tasks to do, which we would have done in that free time. Unfortunately, we always realise these tasks to be done after spending this free time with unimportant things. Right? Do you experience this common scenario? Why don’t we remember those tasks to do in that particular free time?

Answer to the above question is very simple that we are always talking with ourselves that I’m busy. This so called ‘being busy-ness’ is recorded within our minds and creating a strong block of being busy.  So as we get free-time, we could not realise that we have time now and we would spend this time by doing our pending or listed tasks. Hence crux of the story that we should start talking one message to ourselves within our mind continuously that ‘I have time and I’m going to find that out’.

If you are facing the same problem and want to learn about this in detail, get in touch with us here +91-98220-24674 or write to  jeevan@mindhealth.in

 

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Why do we always find attention-seeking personalities?

When someone praise us, we always like it and we smile & nod inside our mind. It feels like a new feather in the hat. When it happens with us, we do wanted to happen it again and again. This feeling gives us short-term satisfaction. But slowly it becomes behavioural characteristic to become an attention seeker. Even we can not identify ourselves that we are behaving like an attention seeker in the group. It does not restrict us to be an attention seeker not only in our professional life but in our personal life and in our social or friend groups also.

We need to introspect ourselves deeply to identify that are we really becoming an attention seeker. There are many reasons or situations from our childhood,  young age and adulthood, which contributes subconsciously in our mind to become an attention seeker. Now we are going to see one reason, which may impact us to become an attention seeker. In our childhood and in our young age, we used to have many informal friend groups. Actually these group dynamics are subconsciously shaping our personalities. In a group, everyone is coming from different backgrounds or different grooming styles  or having different life experiences so it may have inequality in many ways. Normally in these groups, any informal discussion start with some funny, serious, fearful, exciting experiences. There is a possibility that we would not have that type any experience. We tend to get one foot backward, when it starts happening regularly. But we are social animals, we always wanted to live in a group. So we also want to share some relevant experiences in groups to feel ourselves to be part of the group. So we start creating some funny, serious, fearful, exciting experiences in our mind to share in our groups. Once it becomes a practice, we can make those type of experiences instantly in our mind. This habit leads us to bluffing, faking without reasons, bullying unreasonably, which becomes a characteristic of our behaviour to be an attention seeker. We start using this habit in our professional and personal life, which becomes disaster sometimes. So if we observe any attention seeking person anywhere, kindly do not blame him or her immediately. Try to understand that why he or she becomes so.

This type of behaviour may impact very badly on our professional and personal life too. It deteriorate our relationships, our credibility, our social status and our own trust within ourselves. This type of behaviour wastes the most precious thing in our life, that is ‘Time’. It has negative effect of diminishing the love and faith from our parents, wife, children, relatives, friends and clients too. People start avoiding these attention seeking personalities. So do not hesitate and start introspecting.

If you are facing the same problem, get in touch with us here +91-98220-24674 or write to  jeevan@mindhealth.in

Do you postpone your tasks daily?

Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans – John Lennon

We are living in a so dynamic world that we have minimum bagful of tasks to do in a day in our professional as well as in personal life. We always want to complete all the tasks but all tasks could not get completed in a day. So here we start postponing our tasks. But first question arises in this situation that why couldn’t we complete our tasks? Lets find this answer first. We need to question ourselves that how many times we are present with our mind at the time of doing the particular task. If we can keep our mind in the present where we are doing our tasks, we can do the same task in a lesser time. Let us see an example to understand it more easily.

When we brush our teeth every morning, we take 5 minutes or sometimes 10/15 minutes or sometimes 10 seconds would also feels like ages. We should give enough time to brush our teeth but why do we need variable time to make it. This instance shows us that we are not present there in the task but wandering with our mind in many other things and that is how we delay to our tasks. We will see another example. If I have a task of cleaning the table everyday. It takes me 5 minutes to complete. Now if I keep my mind in the present and do the same activity, I can do it in 1 minute. This is how I can save on 4 minutes at my disposal. Do this experiment with yourself, you would definitely realise, how much time we can save in an entire day.

Postponing tasks or procrastination generally does not have anything to do with number of tasks or complexity or responsibility or lack of confidence or lack of skills. We do not keep our mind in the present so our mind starts wandering, it becomes an entertainment in our mind and we start postponing our tasks. Sometimes we wander in some of our happy moments in our past and sometimes we wander in sad or fearful moments in our life. We wander in our imagined future too with sad or happy feeling. These imagined feelings become our emotions in the present and we could not concentrate, where we are now. According to general behaviour of a human being, we tend to choose things, which are easy for us to do. We start choosing things or tasks, where our mind presence would not require to complete the task. We start postponing the important but critical or complicated tasks, where our mind presence is required. So lack of mind presence is the culprit of procrastination in most of the cases.

If you really want to learn to keep your mind in the present, get in touch with us here jeevan@mindhealth.in or +91-98220-24674

Is managing expectations becoming really stressful?

We are born from our mother’s womb and having at least single parent or both parents and few close relatives also. Unfortunately we can not choose our parents and relatives, but we definitely can choose our friends, acquittances, colleagues and partner. Sometimes choosing colleagues is also getting difficult day by day, it becomes compulsive. Right?

We need to face our parents, relatives, friends, acquittances, colleagues and partner throughout our life. Every relation is expecting something from us and even we are expecting something from our above relations. Process of expectations are vice versa. Normally, we are not having any problems with the expectations. But expectations are always endless and it keep going beyond our limits that becomes a problem. This problem creates stress in our mind. With stress, we keep doing same mistakes again and again and could not make clarity in any of our expectations.

We will see a simple and logical example from Mechanical Engineering to understand the gravity of expectations. When two mechanical gears (it means teethes) are coming together and expected to engage in between to function, it needs right support and good lubrication for the smooth functioning. Lack of support and lubrication create sparks in the gear functioning. If both gears start banging on each other, it would result into sparks and then into fire. This fire devastates the gears entirely. As we are progressing ahead with the time, two engaged gears are functioning well and a new gear introduced to engage then new gear needs more lubrication and support for smooth functioning. Sometimes these gears have wear & tear issues so we need to keep its maintenance also.

Similar to the above example our lives are engaged with many different gears together and need right support and good lubrication for smooth functioning of our life. But what is this support and lubrication means in expectations? We are going through chaos of thoughts and different emotion sets, where our thoughts are not channelised and emotions are not regulated. We can give right support to our expectations by channelising our thoughts and regulating our emotions. We can give good lubrication for expectations by understanding ourselves and understanding our expectations more clearly. Deep introspection is needed to understand ourselves. So it gives us a way to understand others’ expectations and keep right expectations from others.

Sometimes few would need help for introspection of ourselves, channelising thought process and regulating our emotions. If you really need any type of professional help, get in touch here:

+91-98220-24674 or jeevan@mindhealth.in

Breathing impacts our emotions & thoughts

“Conscious breathing is a simplest tool on this earth to make our life happy”

In our techno-freak world, we have many ‘Apps’ to manage anything in our materialistic life. Now we have many more iOS & Android Apps for our health care. It’s trending on our social media. But we tend to forget the simplest tool or ‘In-built App’, which nature had given us i.e breathing.

Actually we start our life with the breathing & stopping the breathing is generally considered as end of one’s life. So breathing is so intensely connected with our every activity. It has its own impact on our body & mind. Even if we start observing our breathing, we can recognise different patterns of respiration in our different emotions. When we are anxious, irritated, sad and panic; we have certain pattern of breathing. When we are happy and joyful; we have different pattern of breathing. It proves how breathing is connected with our emotions and mental state. Now it has been medically & scientifically proven that conscious breathing also helps to keep us physically & mentally healthy.

Breathing is so inherent part of us that made us unfocused about our breathing process. We are going through different emotions & thoughts throughout the day. We are concerned about pressures or stress, which we are creating through our emotions and thoughts. But we have easily forgotten to keep a watch on our breathing, which can actually regulate our emotions & thoughts.

Conscious breathing or keeping a watch on our breathing process, when we are doing our day to day activities help to keep us mentally & physically healthy.

So keep breathing, keep walking.

If you need any professional help, kindly get in touch: +91-98220-24674 | jeevan@mindhealth.in

Emotions are the best medicine for managing stress

Emotions are very important and sacred element of our mind. Emotions shape our life and quality of our life. We always have question about importance of thoughts and emotions, so both are two sides of a same coin. If we have sweet emotions for someone then we always have all good thoughts about him or her. On the other side when we have some negative or bad thoughts about someone, we have nasty emotions about him or her. Actually we used to carry negative emotions for a longer period of time. It is our mind game, which we always play within us.

When we are pitching our product or a concept to any new client. We do study them personally and even we study about their company or products. In the process of our research, we collect many things and our thoughts have started processing the negative and positive sides about the client. Considering few bad experiences in our  business deals, we start thinking about negative elements more. In a result, story of our thoughts start imagining all possible negative elements from our known world. Obviously by the rule of nature, our thoughts create negative emotions in our mind. So these negative emotions used to create negativity in our minds, which leads to loosing the deal with the client. Loosing the deal or a client is a stressful situation in any business. This also happens with our personal relationships too.

Our thoughts have great speed and pace. For example, if we close our eyes and start thinking about Himalaya, we reach Himalaya within a mili-second. Actually it is faster than speed of light. But our emotions does not have that much of speed so emotions could not match the speed of our thoughts. So when we have negative emotions, we used to keep those negative emotions for a longer time in our mind. But on the other side, our thoughts have gone far ahead with negative impact. When we approach to any professional or personal tasks, our long carried negative emotions create negative thoughts lead to failure in most of the cases. Consistent failures in fulfilling expectations leads to stress.

We ourselves are only responsible for our success and failure. If we can try to keep the balance in our emotions on a regular basis, we can come up with  rational thoughts. Rational thought process teaches us to see the situations neutrally. Actually this game of our emotions and thoughts are easy to discuss but always difficult to process so we need consistency and persistence to work on our emotional balance and thought process. Sometimes few individuals might need some professional help for the above process.

For any professional help, contact: +91-98220-24674 | jeevan@mindhealth.in

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